Blue Balls Report – Munich: Brunnhilde & La Napolitana

Brunnhilde

She appeared at the hostel where I was staying – a mixed German/Turkish girl who was visiting her SJW Canadian friend (who incidentally, was a ‘broken’ woman in my opinion). I noticed a few IOIs and made some trivial conversation that night.

On the Tuesday I made my way to Marienplatz to meet with a few friends I had made in the hostel – two Canadians and an American. After climbing down one of the bell towers, I discovered her and the Canadian SJW at the bottom conversing with the group.

We made our way around Munich – the Hofbrauhaus for lunch, the English Garden, an odd surfing spot on the river and then a subsequent dip downriver.

I had made a few flirty comments about her not wearing any underwear and received the telltale punch on the shoulder – the classic Tease Punch.

Her Italian/German friend from Napoli joined us – La Napolitana. She and I immediately connected.

Later than evening we played a drinking game (I mean seriously, at 38?!) which included Never Have I Ever. The object of the game is to admit to something you have not done and if someone else in the group has done it, then then need to lower a finger.

I admitted to many more things than almost anybody else at the table. The American, observing Brunnhilde, noticed that she and I both lowered a finger when the challenge was set around “wanting to sleep with someone at the table”. It was clear.

Texting was quite hot between us after Brunnhilde left – I joked that she and I needed to come up with a new Never Have I Ever challenge just for the two of us.

We met for dinner the next day with the SJW and La Napolitana – and the vibe was quite simply DEAD between us.

Blue Balls #1.

La Napolitana

I opened my heart a little too much with La Napolitana

Given that the connection was dead between Brunnhilde and I, I then started working on La Napolitana who was sitting across from me at the table.

She was very sweet, 24, K-selected, and the product of migrant parents from Napoli. Her father was a musician and I showed her a number of videos of my performances in Sydney. She seemed like she wanted to express herself artistically, yet her father had warned to not pursue art.

To me she was K-selected and sheltered in much the same way children of ethnic parents are sheltered in Australia – some follow the rules, others rebel against them.

The conversation was warm over dinner between us. The SJW threw in a baiting comment about how difficult it was for single mothers – and much to my chagrin, I just lost it and told her she was wrong. I talked about male suicides of men who lose access to their children, of my father’s story taking care of two children on his own, and how I measured a person based on their needs and not their gender.

(The SJW irked me – she had said that most of the sex in her life was “non-consensual”. I balked and told her that was a joke – more like non-responsibility. I had interviewed women who were the subject of rape in war crime situations and this SJW was simply trying to distance herself from drunk hookups).

Oddly, at the end of my rant – citing my work, my situation and how the SJW simply was wrong – La Napolitana got up and gave me a hug. It was very unusual.

Later we went for coffee and shishas. She was curios about my short erotic fiction that I was writing (really just fictionalised accounts of women I’ve fucked with a classic arc that engages a woman’s psychological core).

She told me about an American she was dating who had one day simply told her he did not want the relationship and then disappeared. “I know he loves me,” she said. “I wanted to get married”. My thoughts were mixed – he sounded like a case of catch-and-release who made a wise decision rather than fuck with a girl’s life (I wish I had).

Her relationships had been rollercoasters and she confided that she secretly enjoyed the ride. Patterns in relationships is a tell.

Later, at the hostel, Brunnhilde and the SJW left, encouraging me to make sure La Napolitana got home safely. She and I chatted for quite awhile about preparing for marathons, Strawberry Fields (predictable), and where the life journey would take us.

I dropped her back to the main station and made my move – which she rejected. She then reached out for a hug which was like a wall of unexpected affection. She left me with a kiss on the cheek.

The next day I sent her a farewell text and wished that we had had more time to pursue the connection. She wrote back: “I did not want to pursue the connection any more than what we did”.

I was gutted.

I took the unusual step of writing back to her and asking her to delete my number – I find it difficult to stay in contact with girls with whom I have developed an affectionate connection but who do not want any more. I told her I was the sex and adventure guy and liked to feel “love, affection and sex” with girls I like. I had to CUT.

I reflected on this girl all last night and today. I think I was needing affection more than sex and she must have sensed that. I definitely know that I was not suffering from a “failure to feel”.

But in the end we are not owed sex as men. I know it’s a projection but it genuinely feels like she wasted my time as my needs were too high for what she could give.

A great Reference Experience.

Blue Balls #2

Thanks

Many thanks to Nash (https://daysofgame.com) for his guidance and support with La Napolitana.

One thought on “Blue Balls Report – Munich: Brunnhilde & La Napolitana

  1. Great post man. Very raw. Very real.

    > and the vibe was quite simply DEAD between us.

    Why? What changed?

    > which was like a wall of unexpected affection

    Yeah, man.

    We want attention, affection, and sex. All of us. They are almost equally important.

    A lot of what the culture says about men wanting “sex” is really a desire to be touched and loved on. I feel that.

    Super real. Good job.

    > “I did not want to pursue the connection any more than what we did”.

    This may have been exactly right… Or it may have been something else… A false flag. Religiousity, etc.

    My 19 yr old Pixie Girl from Shanghai said similar things, reversed herself, picked fights, etc… She still contacts me.

    Watch what she does, not what she says.

    Play your role. Move toward girls that are the most fun – and away from those that are not. And don’t take any girls words too seriously.

    Okay…

    I am going to switch into TOUGH LOVE territory.

    YOHAMI kicked my ass a lot… And straighted out some kinks in my thinking (made me a better man)… It is with LOVE/RESPECT that I try to do the same here.

    > I took the unusual step of writing back to her and asking her to delete my number – I find it difficult to stay in contact with girls with whom I have developed an affectionate connection

    I have no right to tell you about your experience… But I will anyways.

    You were punishing her here. Or trying to. It’s feminine energy… Emotional, retaliatory.

    What you felt was fine and real. And you can msg me (or another man) to vent this kind of emotion. The emotion is fine. Bring this kind of pain to other men…

    But to dump this on her isn’t good game. It won’t make you a better man… And it is not attractive at all.

    We are the rock. They are the wind.

    > I told her I was the sex and adventure guy and liked to feel “love, affection and sex” with girls I like. I had to CUT.

    Do you think she believed that in this context?

    WWRWD?

    (What would Roy Walker Do?)

    I currently bow to Roy as maybe the best guy that I know of in the scene. I don’t want to be him, but I sure as fuck respect him. Do you think he would msg a girl and tell her to delete his number? A stalker yes, but in this scenario?

    He is “adventure sex guy.” He would not do that.

    I know the situation stung… That is real. I respect it. But you have better options for that kind of emotional intensity.

    Next time… Take all that powerful energy and go approach. The answer to frustration or scarcity is always… Go talk to more girls.

    It was not that girls job to fulfill your needs. That is your job. You can be frustrated… But use that as MOTIVATION for your next round of soul-searching and greatness.

    > I had to CUT.

    Maybe you did, but you didn’t need to say that to her. You were HIGH on “girl drugs” and you were feeling emotional and indulgent. You can do all that… But know it for what it is.

    I’ll be PERSONAL: I had a +1 last night. It was a little complicated. And I have been HIGH all day. These moment flood us with bio- chemicals. We thrash around. That is normal. This is what love-drunk feels like… Even when the love is unsatisfied.

    > I know it’s a projection but it genuinely feels like she wasted my time as my needs were too high for what she could give.

    Projection… That is close to you being honest w/ yourself.

    It is okay to be burned. It is okay to feel burned. But as a man… The responsibility is always yours… Especially when it comes to your own needs.

    > I think I was needing affection more than sex and she must have sensed that.

    Now you’re on the right track. That is real. I respect it.

    > Many thanks to Nash

    Absolutely my pleasure, man. We talked this week on what I think is going on for you… There will be ups/downs.

    You’re a rising star. You’re going to have some unbelievable adventures in the next 10-20-30 years.

    Keep going. I believe in you.

    Viva RedCoco. Viva daygame.

    Like

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