Coach Paul asked his assistant Zak to join us and as we were relaxing on the steps of the GPO in Martin Place watching talent walk by, they asked me what I was trying to get out of this. What were my goals?
I hadn’t thought it through clearly, you know, the kind of goals you would stick to a bathroom mirror or be able to recite to anybody who asked.
I didn’t know. I mumbled a mixture of adventure sex, x number of sets/dates per week, x number of lays per month – quantifiable stuff and philosophical blue sky statements like “overcome fear of women” and “build a Daygame skill set”. Perhaps it was the adrenaline thrill, the dopamine rush, the brief moments of flirting, the equivocations of women when they have a boyfriend, or the constant challenge on the mind and heart. I don’t know – but I had been placed in a zone of feeling that gave a rush and a flow I had not experienced in years, if ever.
Zak pushed me a little – rightly so – about the weasels: those micro-doubts which lead to micro-avoidance. Some are big, some are small, some are hidden. Part of the Daygame process is to try and identify and neutralise them – they creep in and drain energy from your approaches. I get the sense it’s the forebrain creating doubt on the hindbrain’s desire to approach, with layers of societal conditioning and Nice Guyism at play.
Coach Paul, the following day, had pushed me hard and the cognitive load was taking a toll. I needed to slow down. I had realised that the highs of Daygame were being stymied by the hard rock bottom sting of blowouts and rejections and the ever-lingering weasels that drag on your psyche like dead weights around your neck.
We wrapped up our Daygame bootcamp – I had watched Coach Paul play out many one-and-two sets, pushed me to learn the tradecraft, and realised some minor successes along the way. It was addictive, exciting and challenging … and led to my first Daygame date – a cute 23 year old Dutch brunette.